Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Updates on the Crew

Can you believe that our Little Hen will very soon turn 1?!!  He is such a delightful little mancub.  Except for when he's being very trying. ha!  He is talking up a storm these days.  His new words, more, toes, dog, and other random "parroting".  He is determined to walk.  He screeches to get someone to come to him and hold his little hands and walk him around.  (i don't want him to learn to screech when he wants something and i heard myself saying to him , "use your words Hen! use your words!" and i's not even one....what is wrong with this picture?!)  He is getting braver about walking around furniture and transferring from one place to the next with brief seconds of not holding on while he takes a small step.  It won't be long now until he's totally mobile.....and I will never have time to cook dinner or post on the blog again!  Here are some pics of him in the tub.  One of his favorite places to be.  
Little Owl.  As you can see, he was a tad grumpy about being in this picture, but he still looked so cute I couldn't help but use it for this post.  What's new for him?  Well....he is learning all kinds of things, but the thing I am really excited to see is that he is learning to find his voice.  He is asking me "why?" more.  He is telling his brothers what he thinks.  He is questioning the rules.  I admit this can be challenging at times, but I love it!  I love the chance to explain how we do things and why and I love seeing him think about it.  He is changing from little boy to boy.  It's great.
Cricket.  One of my favorite parts of the day, is Cricket's reading lesson time.  We snuggle up on the couch, grab a blanket and a book and go to it!  It is so interesting to be a part of the process.  He is a master at sounding out words and enjoys the sounding out part so much that he sometimes forgets he knows the word already and can easily get lost in the sounds.  It's kinda fun.  Also....he lost his other front tooth!  :D
And then there's Badger.  My sweet boy, growing so quickly into a real little man.  This picture of him is so....unlike him... that I thought I'd use it!  (Unlike that he is rarely "caught" doing anything crazy as he tends to take himself rather seriously.)  He is learning all kinds of things.  Some of the "school" things he's learning are astounding really, but I'll leave you in suspense as you probably wouldn't believe me anyway.  
More importantly he is learning to say what he feels.  What he feels!   The boys recently had a friend over to play and it didn't go as smoothly as it usually does.  Badger's feelings were hurt.  And after awhile of playing, we sat down to lunch and Badger said to his friend...."What happened hurt my feelings.  I thought we were best friends."  Now...let me reassure you that nothing really happened other than some disagreeing about what they should play and all the boys handled it really well.  No one said or did anything mean...they all just kind of struggled through it not agreeing.  But there were sore feelings on both sides and I wasn't really sure what to do or say to make it better.  Then Badger spoke up.  And his friend spoke up about his feelings too.  And after a little more time they were playing together pretty well and their time together ended much better than it started.   

As far as I can remember that was the first time Badger has ever not gotten along with one of his friends.  (besides when he was 2 and didn't know how to share.)  It was so interesting to me and I was actually sort of glad that it happened because it showed me a part of him I didn't know before and gave him a chance to grow.  As he and the other boys grow up I want to help them navigate those kinds of situations.  I want to help them understand their feelings.   I want to help them find the words to work things out.  I feel like, for whatever reason, I am only learning these things now as an adult and it has hindered many friendships that "could've been" had I only known how to be a better friend.  *sigh*  

However...I am glad to be able to say that I know my heart is softened now....i mean....I want to be a good friend now...I genuinely care about other people's feelings now and I am sooo glad to be able to learn this alongside my boys.  It is healing to be loved.  And God has put so many people that love me in my life for which I'm very thankful.

1 comment:

  1. Very thoughtful post, Rebecca. (I just spelled post "poast," like toast, which seemed kind of appropriate, like you are toasting each of your boys as you reflect on them right now. Kind of nice. But I did feel compelled to change it back to "post." Oy, grad school.)

    I just wanted to comment on where you ended up. (I mean - yes, those amazing boys - I can't wait to see them again this summer, and I wish it were sooner. I know this must be what you expect from me by my last couple of comments.) But your thoughts on learning to find the words to express what is in your heart (I'm paraphrasing and perhaps extrapolating) and the connection to people who love you. I think it is both those people, the ones who love you, with whom you learn together to speak the truth of your feelings (as a dear friend of mine is won't to say, "speak the words and be free"), but also those with whom you may feel something other than love. As we have moved about the country these last few years, our ever-expanding community of new friends and acquaintances has continued to give us opportunities to learn to identify the feelings engendered by misunderstandings or merely new-understandings as my own feelings and not necessarily caused by someone else. Your thoughts reminded me of a recent post by Stacy at Mama-Om - I have a really tough time with this one sometimes. There's a too-looong comment for you.

    Say hi to Joel for me. Wish we could be there for Henry's birthday - One!